Gods of Egypt Is Bad. Really Bad. | Movie Review
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Director: Alex Proyas | Starring: Gerard Butler, Brenton Thwaites, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau
Runtime: 127 Minutes | Rating: PG-13 | Score: 1/5
Do you guys remember the incredible fantasy/thriller The Crow? How about the sci-fi noir Dark City? Well, Alex Proyas, the director, has come out with his new masterpiece - Gods of Egypt.
In what seems to be a "Shyamalan-slump", Proyas, who was born in Egypt, directs a film that received severe backlash for its whitewashed casting. Of course, there are plenty of articles that dissect this subject so let's just cover everything else this film does terribly, terribly wrong.
For those of you who don't know, or just don't care, the film centers around a world in where the gods of Egypt dwelt among the humans as they order them around like the slaves of the Bible. The main god who's enforcing his domain is Set (Gerald Butler) who took the position, as well as the eyes, of his nephew Horus (Nikolaj Costner-Waldau). A young thief named Bek (Brenton Thwaites) sets out to take out Set (I, I had to) with the help of Horus in order to reunite with his girl Zaya (Courtney Eaton who played one of the chicks from Fury Road).
The Good:
If there's one positive thing I can say about Gods of Egypt is that it feels like that Dungeon's and Dragons fanatic that you knew in high school was given a million dollar budget and the kid went ALL OUT. It's surprising how the film doesn't shy away from getting crazier and crazier but instead thrives on being one of the most outlandish things that will be released in 2016. Let me give you three examples:
- Horus and Set are portrayed as humans but freakin' Digivolve out of nowhere into falcons and canines.
- There's a scene where Academy Award winner Geoffrey Rush sets himself on fire on a floating spacecraft.
- They let them do this for over 2 hours.
The Bad:
It's obvious that this film will not be on AFI's top films of this decade, but I also understand that this film can appeal to some people's tastes. Does that make it a good movie? Absolutely not.
There are several aspects of a film that are not subjective by any means. One of many are the performances present within a film. Here, Brenton Thwaites is given mediocre lines that are delivered worse than Garrett Hedlund's rendition of Hook in Pan. Butler and Waldau feel like actors that haven't had a hit in over a decade trying their hardest to make a comeback with a CGI-infested film that has a $140 million budget. Chadwick Boseman is the complete opposite of his character, the god of wisdom, with a performance that conveys his regret on signing on to the project before getting his big Marvel deal.
Getting into the budget --- who allowed this?! If John Carter wasn't enough indication that films like these are a bad investment, then it's going to be very interesting to see their reactions Monday morning when they get their box office results. Granted, Proyas makes sure to use every bit of that money on the effects, but that doesn't stop it from feeling like the entire shoot took place in front of a green screen. Any development that there should be for the characters is instead invested in making the golden blood of the gods ooze smoothly.
And again, this movie exceeds two hours!
By the end credits, I give Gods of Egypt the lowest STREAM IT I can give a film solely on the ambitious over-the-top sequences that'll get a reaction out of you. But honestly, after the first couple, you'll be quick to move on to the next film on your Netflix que.
